10 Benefits of practicing self-compassion to reduce anxiety and stress
Caring and talking to yourself as you would a friend is a way of practicing self-compassion.
We all need self-compassion in our lives – desperately. Self-compassion helps us to acknowledge our humanness, and our imperfections, in a kind and gentle manner. It helps us to speak more lovingly to ourselves. It helps us to quiet our inner critic and remind us of who we are and whose we are.
“Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with personal failings – after all, whoever said you were supposed to be perfect?” - Dr. Kristin Neff
Self-compassion is needed for our overall wellness because our emotions and thoughts play a role in our physical health, too. Practicing self-compassion when we feel we’ve failed or come up short can lead to positive health effects. To back that up further, research has shown that self-compassion leads to higher well-being and it helps us to face our regrets in a positive light so we can move on from them.
The basis of self-compassion is to –
recognize your triggers
acknowledge your feelings (ex. naming what you feel, such as “I feel shame”)
sit with those feelings
be aware of your inner dialogue
speak truth, light, and love
Focus on how are you talking to yourself. Is it gentle or is it abrasive? Negative or positive? Truth or lie? Simply thinking thoughts like “I can’t heal” or “this will never pass” or “I am not worthy” can lead your body to believing it. This happened to me. I started to believe, after a while, that I couldn't heal and this, in turn, slowed down my body's healing because it started to believe it too. It was a punch to the gut to realize this, but it was also a break-through for me!
Shifting out of negative self-talk to positive will produce more loving thoughts, more kindness to oneself, deeper breathing, and less stress throughout the body. Ultimately, loving + kind thoughts and words to oneself supports the body’s natural healing process.
I can get behind that, can you?
Self-compassion Benefits
reduces/ lowers stress
supports your body’s stress response
nourishes your hormones
relieves tension and tightness
helps “re-route” negative brain pathways
provides a sense of calm and love for oneself
embraces gratitude and gentle reflection
grows more fruitful with practice
helps you become more resilient
grows your compassion for others
Self-compassion has a plethora of benefits, much like meditation or journaling do. This is because by practicing self-compassion you’re choosing to focus on the present and speak (and think!) positive words to lift yourself back up.
It’s worth noting that self-compassion and self-esteem are not the same. Self-compassion embraces kindness towards oneself while self-esteem embraces confidence when one is doing well. Self-compassion is a sustainable practice that isn’t governed by what the world perceives as “worthy and good”, unlike your self-esteem. This is because self-compassion provides stable feelings of self-worth since nothing is dependent on it, whereas self-esteem shifts when your perceived notion of “doing well” shifts.
According to this study and this one, self-compassion may reduce depression and anxiety through perceived stress. It is also shown to increase the quality of life and promote better sleep.
While there is much research to be done on the impacts of self-compassion on health, the research that has been done has proven that the effects are highly supportive of better health for all genders and ages. How cool is that??
There are many ways to practice-self compassion to reduce anxiety and stress, so it’s important to cultivate a practice that resonates well with you so that you continue to choose to practice self-compassion and build on it over time.
Personally, I choose to speak positive words and affirmations over myself daily. This includes speaking them out loud and thinking about them. One day I might say something like I am strong and well-designed — God has beautifully designed my body to work perfectly, while another day I might say, my health struggles make my body individual and unique or I am thankful for this beautiful day and a fresh start to do life. I also try to meditate and write in my gratitude journal weekly.
I realize that speaking words of affirmations work well for me, but they aren't for everyone. So, I’ve curated some examples for you to help you get started with your self-compassion practice!
Self-compassion Practice Examples
meditating
journaling
speaking/ thinking positive words and affirmations
gentle + restorative movement to really feel your body
getting out in nature
taking breaks to stretch/ walk/ laugh
surrounding yourself with supportive + loving family and friends
massaging tight/ tense muscles
write loving notes or letters to yourself
For more self-compassion exercises, I highly recommend checking out self-compassion.org and Dr. Kristin Neff’s work.
Self-compassion can improve your overall health and bring more ease and kindness into your life. Please take note that self-compassion is a practice. It will take effort and intentionality. It will take you giving yourself grace as you begin to quiet that inner critic that's held the reigns for far too long. It will build over time as you practice it more and more.
Best of all? Practicing self-compassion is worth it because you are worth it, friend!
Ahhh yes, wanting more? I’ve got you! Check out the below blog posts to further support your health and positive outlook on your life!
Sources
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Neff, Kristin. (2021). What is Self-compassion? Retrieved from https://self-compassion.org/the-three-elements-of-self-compassion-2/
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